Water has emotions

Joe: So I found out what was wrong with your toilet. There was a broken up rubber washer stuck in the fluid master. So when your toilet was refilling, the water had a hard time gettin' around that broken up sh*t. That water was probably pissed off it had to fight so hard to get around that sh*t.

(ps. he's not literally talking about sh#t. he's talking about the rubber washer remnants)

Call Waiting

Joe: Hey I saw you called earlier, but I was on the phone & I didn't want to click over. I'm going to do that from now on... I'm going to stop clicking over if I've got another call. Not because I don't want to be rude. I don't care about being rude... I'm rude all the time.